Registrationville [to the tune “Margaritaville”]
Sign up for classes.
Slow as molasses;
Every semester I cry out to God;
No financial clearance,
No chapel appearance;
This whole registration—it smells like the quad.
Chorus
Wastin’ away again in Registrationville,
Searchin’ for my lost schedule for fall,
Some people claim that my advisor’s to blame—
But I know – it’s my own darn fault.
v2
Academic probation,
Grade point of a crustacean,
How it got there I haven’t a clue;
Pulled twenty all-nighters,
Eating pretzels from Snyders,
When I woke up, my classes were through.
Chorus
v3
I saw Carol Herrick,
I was so hysteric,
She told me the deadline had passed—I’m too late;
You’ll need a petition,
Instructor’s permission,
At this point I’ll have to attend Salem State.
Chorus
v4
I’m inside the chapel,
Drinkin’ my Snapple,
Kenny says my attendance was small;
Called Chaplain Carmer,
And here’s the alarmer—
Those trips to Starbucks didn’t count at all.
Chorus
v5
I tried Web advising,
I’m soon realizing,
I can’t even get Scottie Mail from my dorm.
Computer keeps crashing,
I feel like Mac-bashing,
A message from Jud on the screen says “No Porn.”
Chorus
v6
Filled with elation,
No chapel probation,
My advisor will really be thrilled;
I’m no belly-acher,
But here’s the heartbreaker,
The classes I wanted are already filled.
Chorus
Wastin’ away again in Registrationville,
Searchin’ for my lost schedule for fall,
Some people claim that my advisor’s to blame—
But I know –
It’s my own darn fault.
mws 